I’ve been wanting to jump for a while, but so many thoughts rattle around in my head.
What if I fail?
What if it all falls apart?
There is no money saved, no safety net.
No, I jumped off a cliff of safety, of comfort with full intention of soaring on thermal currents and using everything with in me to strengthen my wings…
And honestly? That cliff? That supposable comfort zone? It’s a death trap. Like the frog put into warm water that slowly goes to boiling, that was what that comfort zone was for me.
It was time to leap.
I read so often where people want to make that leap of leaving their miserable 9-5 that they have plodded along in for decades, to starting their own business doing what they love. But fear of losing that so-called security keeps them on the hamster wheel, going nowhere.
It is scary. There are bills to pay, people to feed, living expenses. And if you are like me, single, no partner security…it’s all that much more harder.
Fear…very present at the moment. But the feeling of being trapped where I was never going to get a decent raise, benefits, future, or have any of my talents appreciated, well that out weighed everything.
I think I might have a $100 in my account. It’s already been claimed to pay several bills that way exceed that amount.
Am I worried?
I know how to overcome. I am a survivor of many things and though my knees are scarred, my fingernails are torn, my face is tear-stained, I will stand up and move forward. Somedays I limp…other days I collapse in a corner and cry. But I will get up. The most important incentive and strength that I have comes from God. It’s not from me. It’s from what He has put in me, the talents, the strength, the creativity, that I tap into. I partner with Him. My prayers go up, I lay out my day, and He walks me through it. He has given me so much favor.
Free fall with no parachute, no safety net is terrifying and exhilarating. It’s where I am at right now. And I truly believe that some things cannot happen until you “close a door” so you can walk through the next one. Since given my notice I have started to get more phone calls and bookings for one of my businesses. I have had beautiful support from others, and am building a clientele that is steady and consistent.
Life is too precious to be in a space of negativity. I am embracing this journey with gusto, pain and all, because the only way to that next level of freedom is LEAPING.
Loop to loop